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八角寨

银虫 (著名写手)

[求助] 润色一句话(36个字),材料类,中译英。谢谢!【急!在线等!】

在裂纹扩展过程中,存在一些与主裂纹断开的孤立的微小空洞,这些微小空洞将成为新的裂纹萌生之地。

翻译:During crack propagation, around the main cracks there are some disconnect isolated small cavities, which will become new cracks.
该翻译优点:后面部分挺好的,which 清晰的指代 small cavities
         不足:红色字体部分“around the main cracks there are ” 感觉比较怪。

During crack propagation, there are some disconnect isolated small cavities around the main cracks, which will become new cracks.
该翻译优点:前面很通顺。
         不足:which 很容易变成 the main cracks (错误指代)


请高手帮润色,尽量简明扼要,符合科研英语表述。
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rock_jy

铜虫 (小有名气)

【答案】应助回帖


八角寨: 金币+1, ★★★很有帮助, 非常感谢。 2013-04-08 17:00:16
在裂纹扩展过程中,存在一些与主裂纹断开的孤立的微小空洞,这些微小空洞将成为新的裂纹萌生之地。
Some tiny cavities which are isolated from the main crack and will develop new cracks exist during the crack propagation.

不介意的话分成两句,太刻意追求长句会出错
There will be some small cavities isolated from the main crack during the crack propagation.These cavities will develop new cracks.
回首向来萧瑟处,也无风雨也无晴!
6楼2013-04-08 15:44:20
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行云流水吧

木虫 (正式写手)

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★ ★ ★ ★
八角寨: 金币+4, ★★★很有帮助, 谢谢。 2013-04-08 16:59:21
During crack propagation,  some disconnect isolated small cavities existed around the main cracks, which will become new cracks. 分词短语作定语修饰前面的主语,which指代主语
2楼2013-04-08 11:20:14
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Rio2016

木虫 (小有名气)

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★ ★
八角寨: 金币+2, 有帮助, 谢谢。 2013-04-08 16:59:36
During crack propagation, there are some isolated small cavities disconnected from the main cracks , and they will become new cracks.
在裂纹扩展过程中,存在一些与主裂纹断开的孤立的微??空洞,这些微??空洞将??为新的裂纹???生之地。
During crack propagation, form some isolated small cavities disconnected from the main cracks , and they will become new cracks.
寥寥数年、将就过活
3楼2013-04-08 11:37:52
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喵喵科

金虫 (正式写手)

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八角寨: 金币+1, ★★★很有帮助, 非常感谢。 2013-04-08 17:00:07
During crack propagation,  there are some disconnect isolated small cavities, which will become new cracks,around the main cracks.插入语作同位语,进一步解释前面名词。
4楼2013-04-08 12:21:56
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