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shirongjiu金虫 (正式写手)
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【Activity】Faults-finding Activity- No. 1 已有8人参与
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hello, everyone! the following sentences need perfection. why not try to find the so-called faults here? A week later, I will give the rewrited contents and why I do the alterations. come on! 1) To accelerate the pace of economic reform…… To accelerate economic reform……(to accelerate means to increase the pace of, therefore “the pace of ” is unnecessary words. ) 2) There have been good harvests in agriculture in recent years. There have been good harvests in recent years.(harvests implies agriculture: there are no harvests in industry.) 3) The living standards for the people in both urban and rural areas continued to rise. Living standards in both………(the notion of living standards applies only to people.) 4) The development of our economy in the future will, to a large extent, depend on…… The development of our economy will, to a large extent, depend on……(the future tense of the verb “will depend” is sufficient to express futurity.) 5) We should adopt a series of measures to ensure that…… We should adopt measures to ensure that……(here the plural form of “measures” covers the sense of a series) 6) Following the realization of mechanization and electrification of agriculture… Following the mechanization and electrification of agriculture… 7) It is essential to strengthen the building of national defense. It is essential to strengthen national defense. 8) At that time the situation in northeast China was still one that where the enemy was stronger than the people’s forces. At that time the enemy was stronger than the people’s forces in northeast China. 9) The key to the solution lies in the curtailment of expenditure. the solution lies in the curtailment of expenditure. 10) To ensure a relationship of close cooperation between…… To ensure close cooperation between…… Epilogue: The original sentences have too many unnecessary nouns or verbs. In fact, when we delete these words, we will not change the meaning, resulting in much more concise sentences. [ Last edited by shirongjiu on 2010-5-5 at 10:01 ] |
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