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HUHU0312

新虫 (初入文坛)

[求助] 大家帮帮忙,修改下雅思作文,自己写的,万分感谢

题目:compare the advantages and disavantages of three of the following as media for communicating information. State which you consider to be the most effective. Give reasons for your answers and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Nowadays, with the emergence of numerous medium, there are many ways to communicate information, such as books, television, film, etc. All of them have their upsides and downsides.

Talk about books. As a typical media for education, books usually deliver “knowledge”, ”methology”, or “ideology”-----which is always absolutely collect or accepted by the majorities. As a result, to certify the accuracy, so many months or years are needed to revise a book that newly information cannot pass on up-to-the-minute. Apart from this, we can make notes or label on a book, which facilitate rereading or reviewing. However, it is not easy to retrieve keys words or a special paragraph when needed.

Compared with books, television is more direct and vivid informing people through pictures or videos, which is easy to understand and memorize. Besides literal narrative, it involves body behaviors, actions and others. Unfortunately, we have to wait before the television for its programs just at particular time. Otherwise, we will miss them. Regardless its uncontrollable timetable, it provides a valid method to watch live sports competitions.

As television is constantly used to watch live programs, film is for entertaining in most cases. With more gorgeous pictures, many film stars and their excellent acting skill, people will enjoy immerging into films to relax their bodies and ease their minds. And having a film with boyfriend/girlfriend is regarded to be one of the most romantic things. What to be considered are the film tickets----exorbitant to some extent.

As analyzed above, each media has it own features. In my opinion, books still are more effective for me because reading books is more rapidly while television program always contain many ads and delivering information by listening or watching is much slower. We can make most use of them all to make our daily life colorful.
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yuu177155

铁虫 (小有名气)

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★ ★ ★
benovence: 金币+3, 谢谢参与 2012-10-16 08:31:26
不错,词汇量,语法都够了,例子略显生硬,太"官方"了。可以写出你对这个问题最真实的感受,举出最能信服人的例子,最后在重申自己观点的时候,让别人也能够承认你说的有道理。写的很好!加油!
2楼2012-10-16 08:30:45
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yhyffrshuh

木虫 (正式写手)

流浪者一枚

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我之前在livemocha 上找老外修改的,并附上了雅思评分标准给老外

PS:最好找个念过大学或正在读大学的,虽然是native English speakers 但没文化,你知道的~~~~

可惜自己底子不好,还得再战
Allhumanwisdomissummedupintwowords:waitandhope.
3楼2012-11-07 20:14:05
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