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gmy1990

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专业: 理论和计算化学
管辖: 量子化学

[交流] 【分享】gaussian出来的名言，太经典了已有1人参与

刚任务结束，出来的名言，呵呵...

"THE ACADEMIC HIERARCHY"

THE PRESIDENT:
LEAPS TALL BUILDINGS IN A SINGLE BOUND,
   IS MORE POWERFUL THAN A LOCOMOTIVE,
   IS FASTER THAN A SPEEDING BULLET,
      WALKS ON WATER,
         GIVES POLICY TO GOD.

THE VICE PRESIDENT FOR ACADEMIC AFFAIRS:
LEAPS SHORT BUILDINGS IN A SINGLE BOUND,
   IS MORE POWERFUL THAN A SWITCH ENGINE,
   IS JUST AS FAST AS A SPEEDING BULLET,
      WALKS ON WATER IF SEA IS CALM,
         TALKS WITH GOD.

PROFESSOR:
LEAPS SHORT BUILDINGS WITH A RUNNING START AND FAVORABLE WINDS,
   IS ALMOST AS POWERFUL AS A SWITCH ENGINE,
   CAN FIRE A SPEEDING BULLET,
      WALKS ON WATER IN AN INDOOR SWIMMING POOL,
      TALKS WITH GOD IF SPECIAL REQUEST IS APPROVED.

ASSOCIATE PROFESSOR:
BARELY CLEARS A QUONSET HUT,
   LOSES TUG OF WAR WITH LOCOMOTIVE,
   MISFIRES FREQUENTLY,
      SWIMS WELL,
         IS OCCASIONALLY ADDRESSED BY GOD.

ASSISTANT PROFESSOR:
MAKES HIGH MARKS ON WALLS WHEN TRYING TO LEAP TALL BUILDINGS,
   IS RUN OVER BY LOCOMOTIVES,
   CAN SOMETIMES HANDLE A GUN WITHOUT INFLICTING SELF INJURY,
      DOG PADDLES,
         TALKS TO ANIMALS.

GRADUATE STUDENT:
RUNS INTO BUILDINGS,
   RECOGNIZES LOCOMOTIVES TWO OUT OF THREE TIMES,
   IS NOT ISSUED AMMUNITION,
      CAN STAY AFLOAT WITH A LIFE JACKET,
         TALKS TO WALLS.

UNDERGRADUATE AND WORK STUDY STUDENT:
FALLS OVER DOORSTEP WHEN TRYING TO ENTER BUILDINGS,
   SAYS, "LOOK AT THE CHOO-CHOO,"
   WETS HIMSELF WITH A WATER PISTOL,
      PLAYS IN MUD PUDDLES,
      MUMBLES TO HIMSELF.

DEPARTMENT SECRETARY:
LIFTS TALL BUILDINGS AND WALKS UNDER THEM,
   KICKS LOCOMOTIVES OFF THE TRACKS,
   CATCHES SPEEDING BULLETS IN HER TEETH AND EATS THEM,
      FREEZES WATER WITH A SINGLE GLANCE,
         IS GOD.

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