[交流] 【小组】阅读第八期-How To Convince People You're Smarter Than You Actually Are 已有9人参与

外语版"我爱学英语之每周阅读"活动第八期, 欢迎虫友积极参与活动。欢迎大家就阅读材料内容发表自己的看法！每个回帖我们将给予1-10个金币奖励 How To Convince People You're Smarter Than You Actually Are For starters, you're already pretty smart. You're reading a blog on a science site called "Emuch" instead of just throwing your computer in the river because you can't figure out where the Facebooks are. But if you need to seem even smarter, because all your friends ever talk about is Fermat's Last Theorem and David Lynch movies, then you can either get new friends or follow these steps: Step 1: Accessorize. Put on some glasses. If you already wear glasses, just keep adding more pairs of glasses until your head starts to hurt. Your head won't hurt because of the weight of the glasses; it'll hurt because it's filling with intelligence. Next, add a bowtie and labcoat. If you already wear a bowtie and labcoat, you are obviously already a scientist and have no use for this post. Go away. Otherwise, intentionally mess up your hair, because who has time for well-kept hair? Clearly not you, you've been busy with, you know, equations or whatever. Step 2: Prepare You now look so awesome that people will assume you're either crazy-smart or just regular yells-at-pigeons crazy, so you need to place yourself in the former category. First, steal one smart-sounding phrase from Wikipedia and memorize it. Make sure it's about philosophy or history or something, and not about giant anime robots or Tara Reid. Good: "Central to Hegel's conception of knowledge and mind (and therefore also of reality) was the notion of identity in difference." Bad: "Here is a list of famous orcs." With your smart phrase memorized, pick one enormous word from a thesaurus and learn that, too. Be sure that you know what it means, and that you can use it tactfully. Step 3: Converse Now you're ready to take your newfound intelligence for a test drive. (Metaphorically. Do not attempt an actual test drive. Your many pairs of glasses have rendered you too smart to operate a car.) Strut intelligently to your local Starbucks or secret underground research facility and join in a conversation. Whatever people are talking about—"Oh, it sure is hot today," or, "How did you get in here, I'm calling security"—the important thing is that you employ your Smart Wikipedia Phrase as soon as you can wedge it into the conversation. Good: "Yes, it is hot today! You know what else is hot? Hegel's conception of knowledge and mind." Also Good: "Well, the Celtics are weak at point guard. They should sign 18th-century German philosopher Georg Hegel, but unfortunately he is dead." Everyone will stare in silence, because of your brilliance. In conclusion, smugly drop your Enormous Thesaurus Word. Step 4: Success How did it go? Are hot scientists, or at least supermodels dressed as scientists, making out with you yet? If not, perhaps you didn't shout your Wikipedia phrase loudly enough. Anyway, that's beside the point. You are now a genius, and that's what really matters.   Fess up, All WOODWORMS!!!!! When was the last time you said something to make yourself seem smart? (And what was it?) [ Last edited by chrisqiang on 2010-7-5 at 11:38 ]

回复此楼

» 猜你喜欢

• 一志愿中科大材料与化工，353分还有调剂学校吗 已经有13人回复
• 085600材料与化工调剂 已经有6人回复
• 320求调剂 已经有6人回复
• 期刊推荐 已经有5人回复
• 有没有接收比较快的sci期刊呀，最好在一个月之内的，研三孩子求毕业 已经有7人回复
• 又一批高校组建人工智能学院 师资行吗 不是骗人吗 已经有4人回复
• 297，工科调剂?河南农业大学本科 已经有15人回复
• 337求调剂 已经有3人回复
• 申博/考博 已经有5人回复
• 申博 已经有3人回复

» 本主题相关商家推荐: (我也要在这里推广)

高级回复