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Chancy007

新虫 (正式写手)

ESEPI: 1
应助: 0 (幼儿园)
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虫号: 2250227
注册: 2013-01-19
专业: 认知心理学

[交流] On love

In my retrospection, I've done many childish and selfish things in the first relationship.

Pinning too much faith on your beloved one would only make bed for the following disappointments.

Those grievous days, days when you knew that a broken mirror would never join together, carved out many negative feelings in heart. It was vivid, and once in a while leaped itself out.

I was then desperately overwhelmed by a strong sense of loss, disappointments, regrets, helplessness...all negative feelings... I rejected to go out of the dorm room and see those familiar environments on campus. Tears, for girls, could be so easily out of control that they seemed to take away all together with the appetite and strength. Then staying in the dorm room turned out to be indeed a wise choice, allowing me to cry for a while and lie in bed for another while without feeling awkward.

Then those bad feelings began to horsewhip me to reconsider what love is all about...and with what kind of protection could I survive in the second (and hopefully the last) relationship.

Falling in love is like two people, who have been strangers, suddenly let the wall between them break down, and feel close, feel one. This moment of oneness if one of the most exhilarating, most exciting experiences in life. However, this type of love is by its very nature not lasting. The two persons become well acquainted, their intimacy loses more and more its miraculous character, until their disappointment, their mutual boredom kill whatever is left of the initial excitement.

Therefore, "falling for" love is no better than "standing" in love.
大家都在寻觅爱，然而成熟的爱是给予而不是霸占。恋爱固然盲目，不够配对的伴侣却迟早要面对终结的审判。我跟颖姐开玩笑说，眼光不要太高，该妥协就妥协。发自内心，却欣赏她的感情洁癖。怎么能确定和这人能一直开开心心生活呢：先匹配，而后求同存异。接受对方本来的面目，也尊重他/她按自己的方式去“成长”。Love is an activity, not a passive affect. It's more about giving, not receiving. A feeling comes and it may go, while true love could stay forever, with its firm commitments to support and the most genuine appreciation...

TOO late!
Good night!!

Chancy, the single dog
4th, August, 2017

感觉上次写的很潦草，有空改…
现在觉着不管怎样阴晴圆缺，两个人在一起要比单身时候更开心，这就很好了。

如果观察小孩子，发现他们的快乐特别简单。烦恼来了，哭一哭，隔天就没有影子了。他们爱自己，也偏爱自己喜欢的某些人，并且不加遮掩；没有有色眼镜也不懂身份标签，"纷纷扰扰与我无关"。。。当大家都优秀的时候，能保持童心的人就变得特别了。

2017.8.23
Chancy at home

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